Wow! What a few weeks. I’ve been in hospital undergoing major surgery. Well I suppose eight hours in theatre and a further two days in an high dependency unit could be classed as major …
What Doesn’t Kill You Only Makes You Stronger
All this was almost scuppered the day before. My surgery had been planned, cover sourced for phone lines, sub contractors in place and the plan A was ready to go. Under no circumstances did I expect that ten hours before, I’d be hit with the news my wife had been diagnosed with secondary cancer.
Shell shock! Every emotion hit me and I was a blubbering wreck inside. I still had to show strength for my wife who had gone to pieces but we had faced this once before and I knew she was strong enough to face it again. Still, it couldn’t have come at a worse time.
The other problem was due to the type of cancer she had and without more tests, no plan could be formulated. Explaining to her consultant what was due to happen, he suggested that it could be a couple more weeks before the final plan was decided. So I decided to go ahead with my own surgery.
My wife finally breaks down late Wednesday night and pretty much told me that she didn’t want me to go through with it. What the heck do you do? The saying “what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger” sort of doesn’t apply here. My surgery was going to hurt like hell and I knew I’d be as weak as anything for the next six to eight weeks. I wouldn’t be able to help her.
Well everything went to plan … almost! Evidently I’d challenged the surgical team when on the table hence ending up in the High Dependency Unit for two days instead of one. So I was returned to a normal ward and on Sunday my wife came to visit. Fortunately her sister was with her as her family rallied to support. Thanks to her own cancer, she has been advised to no longer drive. Not that she looked capable of driving – let alone walking – something was wrong,Thursday came, I arrived at the Churchill Hospital in Oxford. My consultant came to see me at which point I very nearly lost it when I explained what was going on with my wife. He joked “we have set a lot of time aside for your surgery, give it a couple of weeks and you can be strong and back home to help and support your wife. There will never be a right time” at which point I said “I’m here aren’t I?” He laughed and said that he’d see me in surgery.
Under the care of the Oncology team in Milton Keynes, she was admitted to hospital as well. Technology is great for some things, but there are times when you need the personal interaction. I’m in Oxford, she was in Milton Keynes and there was nothing anyone could do. I had to wait for news.
Following some more testing, they removed a blockage, which in turn resulted in further damage and pancreatitis. Did anyone see the storms in MK? It certainly poured on the two us. So she is under the care of MK General and I’m at Oxford Churchill – and neither of us will see each other until Saturday.
Best of all I can surprise my wife and give her the boost she needs – unless, of course, she reads my blog post; then she’ll know I’m hoping to be back at the weekend!I’ve been pushing and working hard. Physio’s are a determined breed and my goal is to get well enough to be released on Saturday. I’ve had a few setbacks but came back fighting. My surgeon says that if by 8am on Saturday morning everything is looking good I can go home. I could have kissed him but I hadn’t done a risk assessment!
Fingers crossed that the old saying will come true and I’ll actually be stronger; but it’s going to take a long time to get there.All I can say is that it’s been a hard couple of weeks. Like in every small business, no work means no income, so there’s a struggle ahead for the next few months. I’ve got to create a new plan of attack too!
Until next time …